Thoughts on how we can make small changes in our lives to lead happier and more fulfilling lives. As humans, we have been trying to figure out what makes us happy for as long as people have been keeping written records.
How we seek happiness and satisfaction in our lives is directly tied to how much we think we understand about who we are. It is an ongoing pursuit that sometimes leads to answers, but usually just leaves us assuming more than when we started.
The truth is, we don’t really know who we are as individuals. We truly only understand what has happened to us and even those memories change over time as we live them and look back on them later in life. The search for happiness can lead us down some interesting paths if we let it. The idea that happiness is not something you have, but rather something you are is an interesting one. I’m primarily speaking about happiness as it relates to our overall mood and temperament, not some joy that comes from a particularly happy event in life.
What are some unwritten rules of a happy life?
The first and most important is to understand that the pursuit of happiness is not about changing who you are as a person, but rather learning to live within those limits. For example: If I am very introverted and shy it would be unreasonable for me to expect myself to go out and become an extrovert just so that I can feel happy all the time.
Striving for a goal that is not achievable based on your natural disposition is a recipe for unhappiness and frustration. It’s important to understand what you are capable of as a person, both good and bad so that you can face those challenges with the appropriate mindset.
The second unwritten rule is to avoid comparing yourself to others. It’s a losing battle you simply can not win. By watching and comparing yourself to other people around you, do you think that makes them compare themselves to you? Of course, it does! The only person we can control or change is ourselves, so that should be where our focus is.
This rule also applies to expectations of how life should turn out. You are not owed anything by anyone, even yourself or the world around you. Acceptance of this is another important step to being content with where you are in life and who you are as a person.
Last but certainly not least, be okay with your own flaws and struggles. Everyone has them, so why waste time and energy pretending they do not exist and trying to “overcome” them? Your flaws are what make you unique and therefore special. They are also the source of your strengths, so embrace them!
It is by no means an easy thing to do and it definitely isn’t a linear path. Like life itself, the road to happiness is full of twists and turns and unexpected detours. We must be able to adjust our course as we go along and we can not expect everything to work out how we planned.
By understanding where our limits lie as individuals, accepting who we are in life, and being comfortable with ourselves it is possible to achieve some happiness.
Read Also: The Power of Mindfulness
Blessing Iyamadiken loves the art of storytelling and enjoys creating all types of content from news to entertainment. She is also a feminist and very passionate about Gender Equality. In her spare time, she loves to read or binge on Netflix.