Being a woman in any career path comes with its unique set of challenges.
Even areas seen as traditionally feminine such as cooking and beauty still see women chefs and stylists sidelined and untreated unfairly.
In areas like education, academia and knowledge production, women are not free of the stereotypes that comes with being a woman seeking a Masters or on track for a PhD.
It is however assumed that being in an environment that encourages critical thinking will see the criticism of concepts like gender inequality. But that is far from the case.
Urban Woman Magazine recently spoke to some women in academia and asked them to share the highs and lows of.being a woman in the field.of research and knowledge production.
Read their responses below.
Nafisa
What inspired me to go for my Master’s were three things:
1. I always knew I would further my education, but I wanted it to be for the right reason.
2. I was at a really low point in my life, everything I tried seemed to fall apart. But I realized that school was the one thing I had control over. So I ran back to it before I lost myself completely.
3. I studied ICT for my undergraduate degree and worked in tech for two years. But something still felt missing, I didn’t know what career path I wanted to focus on. That’s when I decided to look for a suitable Master’s program that aligned with my background.
Surprisingly, most people around me were supportive.
Maybe because they knew school was the one thing I could always control and that I genuinely love reading (which is funny, I love reading for entertainment not to teach people). So people quietly made their assumptions about what I planned to do with my degree (like becoming a lecturer).
But I remember an elderly man I had never met before in university, found out I was over 25, doing a Master’s, and unmarried. He had a real issue with that. He kept insisting I should get married first before thinking about education. I didn’t even know the man, but he was determined to tell me what my priorities should be.
In my department, there weren’t many negative comments, mainly because the course lacked women, and the school was trying to get more of us into the program. The comments I received were often about how “smart” I am — even though I’m a woman who doesn’t have responsibility. But people tend to underestimate my knowledge simply because I’m a woman. And there’s always the assumption that women shy away from hard work or are too soft.
I remember when the course colleague was looking for people to join his team and outright said he didn’t want women on the team because they would “drag him backwards.”
There was also a time my dad’s friend asked when I planned to get married. I smiled and said, “After I get my PhD and have $300,000 in my account.” He laughed and said, “Don’t you know you’re a woman?”
Despite everything, I’ve had the opportunity to publish five papers, and grow as both a researcher and reviewer. But on the tough days, I constantly feel the pressure to prove myself; to professors, peers, and even myself. Impostor syndrome creeps in often.
There’s also the invisible emotional labor, the overwhelming sense that I must do everything alone. I’m often afraid to ask for help because I worry that the price of that help might be more than I can afford, especially if it means owing someone in a way that makes me uncomfortable.
My advice? It’s okay to change your mind. I’ve thought about dropping out more times than I can count. If not for my friends, I probably would have. As a woman, you’re allowed to change your mind. Just because you chose to pursue a graduate degree doesn’t mean you must stick with it, if it no longer aligns with your life or goals. If you’re sponsoring yourself, please know: quitting doesn’t mean failure. And remember, sometimes the biggest obstacle isn’t society, it’s the pressure we put on ourselves.
Oke
My parents inspired me to go for a Masters degree. As a child, I watched my mother prepare for her Masters exams and it pains me to know that she never got to complete that because she had to focus on us.
My father too was good at school and I know that the complexities of life prevented him from pursuing more education. From them, I knew that my desire was attain the highest level of education possible. I don’t feel guilt, I just want them to see their child achieve what they couldn’t.
Last year, they pushed me to apply for my Masters and they have been supportive cause they wanted me to get on with life and stop waiting for international scholarships that may never come. My father was even talking about PhD next and I’m like woahh chill.
Anyhoo, good moments for me have been my family and friends. They have housed, counselled, financed and provided emotional support and care. Even my grandma that was big on marriage and all was super stoked for me. So yay.
I won’t say I’ve had any bad moments, however it’s been pretty difficult making friends. Especially when you’re not sure if they have the same values as you. My classes are online as well so that has limited my social interactions too. The misogyny is loud at this level too. You would think that more education means more enlightenment. No sis, it’s the opposite. The casual misogyny during classes, tutorials, even in the hostel. It is sad.
I haven’t had to deal with any negative comments and I am happy about that. Glad to know that my community is progressive on that front.
My advice to any woman who is unsure about higher education is that they should please go for it. It isn’t the easiest thing in the world but do it anyway. We are privileged to live in a time where women can attain higher education. So take advantage of that, for the sake of the women who can’t and for those who fought to get us here.
Jojo
Okay so I’m a lover of education. I LOVE ACADEMIA. I love learning and I love literally feeling myself getting smarter. Because of my background- postgraduate study is a given for real. No questions.
Some of my key good moments involves reaching out to Professors via cold emailing (to schools i’m applying to) and hearing them validate my ideas and research interests. It a very warm feeling.
Some bad moments would probably be typical misogynistic moments from old lecturers and professors. I remember in Undergrad, when I spoke to one of my professors he basically told me that becausw I had a first class, I don’t need any other degree and I should just marry a rich man who can take care of me and plan to be a first lady.
I am loved at home. I always have been and it helps me drown out all the noise. My parents and sisters have been supportive right from the beginning and have offered to give me whatever support I require to achieve my dreams. There’s no one at home disturbing me to “settle down and marry”.
If you’re unsure, please by all means – Go for it! You can do it and I promise, your future self will thank you. If it’s the funds please know that over $300m goes unclaimed in scholarships ANNUALLY! you can always find something for you.
Please, please and please- GO FOR IT! Be your number one supporter even if you have no one. ❤️
MU
My biggest inspiration for going for a master’s degree might sound a little cheesy, but I really love the rigors of academia, I love the energy of the classroom, the pulse of research, and the almost sneaky serendipity of new findings. Also, for my undergrad thesis I worked on the sexual violence and the culture of silence in Nigeria, and working on such a women-related cause created a hunger in me to find out more, especially since I found that this silence doesn’t initially come from the victims themselves but from their environment, especially as the the perpetrators were often family members or significant figures in victims’ lives.
A significant moment in my academic career that wasn’t great, albeit I’m hesitant to deem negative, was when I arrived my first class to find out that I was the only person of colour. It was very jarring as I’d never until that moment been aware of the colour of my skin. Thankfully, that passed and I have an amazing rapport with my peers and profs now.
I’ve had many wonderful moments in the course of my academic career. I thrive on the validation of my research arguments being called original. One of my most significant was when a prof recommended I submit my paper on misogyny in tech to the Atlantic. Also, i think being head-hunted for supervision by a big shot Prof in my department because of my paper on patriarchal survivalism and feminist possibilities in a post-apocalyptic world is definitely one of my biggest highlights.
I’ll say I’ve received a lot of warmth and support from friends and family through my academic journey and I’m incredibly grateful for that. Those who matter to me support my vision and it is their opinions that count. However, there’s been some caustic comments from a few odd-balls about the fact that I should be thinking more about marriage than the classroom. But like I said, these opinions don’t faze me.
A significant event that took place, though, was during my grad school application season. I’d gone to request a reference letter from the then HOD, and he kept preaching to me about the importance of being married before furthering my studies, effectively refusing to hand me the reference letter I came for. If it hadn’t been a required document, I would have left his office in exasperation. Eventually, I had to concede that I had a man who had come to ask my parents for my hand in marriage (a big lie) before he let me have my reference. Shout out to my amazing undergrad supervisor, who wrote me a stellar reference (she’s a woman, lol).
My advice to women unsure about getting advanced degrees is that they think about it critically. In my opinion, the more educated women, the better for our world. But I understand that the decision to go for another degree is not one to be taken lightly. My go-to method for any decision I feel myself wavering about is to whip out my trusty pen and paper a create a good old pros and cons list.
Somehow, seeing everyone laid out helps me decide what is best. Also, consider testing the waters by signing up for shout courses like a three or six-month diploma and online classes. This would give you the experience in a shorter amount of time and a smaller amount of course load. Then, maybe after that, you can make a decision on whether or ignore it is for you.
Like many of life’s endeavours, getting an advanced degree is not a walk in the park and it’s honestly not every cup of tea, so it’s not a decision that should be approached with levity. However, it can be incredibly fulfilling if indulged for the right reasons.
Angel Nduka-Nwosu is a writer, journalist and editor. She moonlights occasionally as a podcaster on As Angel Was Sayin’. Catch her on all socials @asangelwassayin.